


Desire

by chaenyoo



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: M/M, NOT MY USUAL 3 AM, Not everyone has lines, Seonghwa is horny but soft at the same time, The others are just there to sleep, no beta we die like men, written at 3 am
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-29 16:24:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19404055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaenyoo/pseuds/chaenyoo
Summary: Everyone in their group of friends know about his crush, except San. But only three of them know his actual desires. The rest think that his feelings are pure but little did they know..Seonghwa is a horny loser.





	Desire

Seonghwa mumbles a curse word whenever he watches the shorter blond slide his fingers through his hair.

It’s a perfectly normal thing to do but when it’s San who’s doing it, Seonghwa feels like he’s going to combust at any moment. He doesn’t care if the others, even when their sexiest friend, Wooyoung, does it. He doesn’t care at all. He doesn’t care about anything.

But Choi San is definitely an exception.

Seonghwa is known as one of the most 'civilised' people in his group of friends. Well, other than being the oldest, he acts like he’s an actual prince, prim and proper. He dresses neatly, he does his responsibilities on time and perfectly— He’s an older brother whom they can rely on. But deep inside, Seonghwa’s just as wild as them. He’s just a horny little shit when it comes to San.

San, on the contrary, is one of the wildest among the eight of them. He’s loud, pretty talkative, doesn’t seem to run out of energy at all. He’s not the youngest but he acts like the youngest and he’s seen as the adorable friend— not for Seonghwa though. He’s a sexy demon in the eyes of the eldest.

Seonghwa likes observing San, not to be creepy but he just can’t help but look at the too-perfect-for-him friend of his. Most of the time, he just wants to plant kisses all over San’s body, maybe make out with him or even beg the younger to just fuck him hard all night long. But unfortunately, he can’t. He doesn’t have the guts to make a move. Seonghwa is simply too big of a coward to even tell San how much he likes him. In short, he’s a loser who’s madly in love with one of his close friends.

He’s only able to survive his everyday craving for a Choi San by ranting to his most trusted comrades, Hongjoong, Yunho and Wooyoung.

He has been friends with Hongjoong the longest and he’s the first one to know about his growing feelings for San.

As for Yunho, he’s the best at keeping deep dark secrets. The taller male just finds his sexual desires hilarious but remains silent about it nevertheless.

And for Wooyoung— it’s rather a weird thing to have trusted him. Wooyoung is the closest to San and could have easily told his best friend about everything Seonghwa thinks of. He wasn’t one of the options among the people to trust but Seonghwa accidentally sent a wrong message to the younger male, consisting of one his sexual fantasies towards San. And of course, the rest is history. Now, Wooyoung provides him all the ‘necessary’ information about San— like what kind of soap he uses, how much insoles he’s using at a given day, how tight he’s hugging his favourite dog plush the night before. All sorts of stuff, really. It’s complete shit but Seonghwa likes knowing a lot.

Everyone in their group of friends know about his crush, except San. But only the three mentioned names know his actual desires. The rest think that his feelings are pure and sacred but little did they know, Seonghwa is a horny coward.

Right now, all eight of them were in Seonghwa and Hongjoong’s shared penthouse. It was normal for them to have sleepovers in their place since it’s the most spacious one and has the most convenient location for everyone. Plus, they only do it every last Friday of the month.

Seonghwa and his personal three musketeers were staying in his room and the other four were in the living room, scaring the wits out of each other as they chose to watch a horror movie in the middle of the night. He has become so hopeless and just wanted to get it over with.

“You can just pull him into a bed and ask him to fuck you right there and then.” Wooyoung suggests nonchalantly. He says the word ‘fuck’ so casually like he was saying ‘I’m hungry’.

“That’s not how it works-“ Seonghwa resists the suggestion with an extreme blush on his face.

“Yeah, that’s now how it works for cowards like you.” Wooyoung teases him just a bit more before getting a hit from Hongjoong, who’s practically waiting for the right time to punch him.

Yunho shakes his head and clicks his tongue in dismay. Seonghwa isn’t entirely sure what the taller boy meant by this but he’s obviously disagreeing on something. Is he disagreeing on how Seonghwa was being a loser or is he disagreeing on Wooyoung’s stupidest suggestion?

“Maybe we could start with confessing your feelings as pure as possible before asking for sex?” Hongjoong speaks, side-eyeing Wooyoung who’s massaging his arm to ease the pain. “No fucking before confessing.”

“That’s boring.” Wooyoung mumbles but instinctively evades Hongjoong’s hand which only moved because it wasn’t in the right position. He’s guilty of the little insult even if no one technically cared about it.

“But how do I even tell San?” Seonghwa furrows his eyebrows. He’s growing more and more frustrated. It’s been three years ever since he started feeling like this towards San and it’s sad because in those three years, he was stuck with his imagination of being the younger’s boyfriend.

“Like how Wooyoung confessed to me.” Yunho answers in a sweet voice.

“Like how I confessed to you? Didn’t we lose both of our virginity on that day too?” Wooyoung, once again, nonchalantly says his sex life. Seonghwa has no idea of how shameless the guy can get.

“We did but I’m talking about the confession part here so please don’t you dare say anything else.” Yunho clasped his hands as a warning to his boyfriend. “Anyhow, the confession was really sweet so you might want to listen.” He points at Seonghwa who luckily, was already in the mood to listen.

Yunho basically tells him about the time his idiot of a boyfriend told him about his feelings. Wooyoung makes remarks about it which Seonghwa just ignores while Hongjoong takes care of actually hitting the younger. Much to his surprise, the shameless short male was actually sweet— He confessed on Yunho’s birthday. He took the tall male to a date which Yunho was oblivious to, they went to the planetarium, had a casual lunch, went ice skating and had a romantic dinner. Seonghwa’s in awe at how much effort Wooyoung spent just to tell Yunho that he loves him.

Can he do that though? He isn’t as vocal as Wooyoung that his actions would only be seen as friendly gestures.

“That’s actually amazing.” Seonghwa nods in approval. “But I’m not someone who’s as expressive”

“Maybe it’s time to be expressive?” Hongjoong leans forward to pat Seonghwa on the shoulder.

“He is expressive.” Wooyoung speaks in a surprisingly softer voice than his usual. “Don’t you see how much he expresses his desperation for San yet he still manages to calm down and not show any sign of arousal? Damn.”

“Oh my god baby, shut up.” Yunho just slaps his own forehead in his failure to tame his talkative idiot. “I am this close to hitting you.”

“Hit me with your best shot.” Wooyoung winks at his boyfriend but receives a kick on the leg from Hongjoong.

The three of them burst into laughter. They were probably heard by their other friends who were in the living room. But they’re probably too scared to even care. Seonghwa was scared too. He’s scared of the day when he’s just going to become so impulsive that he’ll kiss San in front of everyone and carry the younger one to his bedroom. It’s probably going to happen if he’s drunk or simply when he’s had enough.

San himself doesn’t help with his situation at all. The smaller blond tend to visit his dying ass during work hours which is good because he owns the company and no one cares about who’s visiting him but at the same time, it’s bad for his mental and emotional state. What’s more annoying is that San always has a little present in hand when he visits. It varies from mini desserts, specialty drinks to wholeass meals which are all made by San himself. The younger male is the owner of the famous cafe with the main branch that was oh-so-conveniently located below his company’s building.  
There were ‘bad’ days when Seonghwa had to endure his extreme want for San. He can’t deny that there are times when he wants to gobble the smaller male up in his office and have that hidden desire of getting caught by his own secretary.

But then, he’s hit with his innermost wish and that is to marry Choi San. Setting aside every dirty thought he had and will be having, Seonghwa would like a happy ending with San: Buying a house in the rural area, adopting ten dogs and treating them as their own children and holding San’s hand while enjoying the cool breeze. Yet he thinks, how could he ask for marriage if he can’t even ask for a date.

The Friday night ends like usual, ordering food, eating it at exactly 11 pm then they go for drinks at midnight. It’s nothing out of the ordinary. They all fall asleep on the floor of the living room which was somehow nostalgic since they were always falling asleep in one room during their university years, the time when Seonghwa was continuously falling in love with San.

Seonghwa got up at exactly 6 am. He’s always the first one to wake up regardless if he’s the last one to fall asleep. It’s been in his system to have coffee prepared for his friends when they wake up. To his surprise though, the kitchen already smelled like coffee as he entered.

He sees San brewing, ignoring the expensive coffee maker and the commercial coffee mix on the side. San has always liked making drinks with his own hands hence managing his own cafe now. The younger man turns around and immediately forms a big smile on his face as he notices Seonghwa staring at him. It wasn’t exactly the right time for Seonghwa to feel the devil inside him waking up so as of the moment, only the purest of thoughts went popping off in his mind.

_Please be my husband._

  
“Good morning.” San slides the mug over to the older when he sat down by the opposite side of the table. “Does your head hurt?”

“Not really.” Seonghwa is delighted by the smell of the freshly brewed coffee. San’s brew has always been his favourite. “I didn’t get wasted not like the other nights. I’m surprised you’re up though? You’ve always been one of the heaviest drinkers as far as I’ve witnessed.”

San places the other mugs on the table, forming a little circle. He then takes his and sits right across Seonghwa. He puts his hands around the mug, not minding how hot it was. Besides, it was a chilly morning so he kind of needed it.

“For how long have you been fantasising about me?”

Seonghwa spits out the coffee and chokes. He kept coughing afterwards and wanted to cry for help from whoever else is up but no, he had to face the reality.

“Sorry, I wasn’t really watching the horror movie last night. You know, I’m one of the biggest cowards in our group.” San continues to talk as Seonghwa slowly dies in front of him. “So instead, I thought of coming to your room to join you guys but I ended up staying by the door and eavesdropping.”

Seonghwa stopped coughing eventually but his heart couldn’t stop beating fast.

“Looks like I no longer have to confess.” He tries to talk in the calmest manner he could do and his voice cracks by the end of his sentence. San laughs at it in a teasing way.

Seonghwa just wants to bury himself at this point.

“You didn’t have to in the first place.” San drinks from his mug. “Wooyoung has been telling me some things but he doesn’t tell me about your fantasies. so I didn’t expect the stuff I heard last night.”

“He tells you?!” Seonghwa widens his eyes, anger rising up. “I knew he couldn’t be trusted.”

“Nah, don’t be mad. He doesn’t know he’s been telling me.”

“What have you been doing to your best bud?” Seonghwa widens his eyes again but this time, fear rises up.

“I’ve been drugging him.” San says with a blank face that made the older instinctively stand up. He laughs it off however.

“I’m joking! Of course we would occasionally drink in our apartment whenever Yunho works out late. When Wooyoung gets tipsy, he becomes a lot more talkative and so when I ask about you, since I know you two are close, he mentions your love for me.”

Seonghwa tries his best to take in all the words that have been thrown at him but only to remember one part of it.

“Why would you ask about me?”

San smiles at the remark, his dimples showing. He looks down on his mug then Seonghwa notices his shoulders started shaking. It confuses him but when he asked, the shorter blond just begins laughing out loud.

Did he say something wrong? Did he miss something?

San isn’t a subtle person. He says whatever he wants, does whatever he wants. He wasn’t as snarky and straightforward as Yeosang but he’s expressive of what he wants to happen. Seeing him like this shows how dumb Seonghwa has been. He tries to remember all the days he’s seen San and nothing seemed to connect.

“Clearly you’ve been too busy with your own sexual desires to think about the possibility of mine being the same.”

Seonghwa’s jaw drops instantly.  
Suddenly, the moments when San visited him in his office began flashing in his mind. He remembers all the handwritten things on the boxes and cups. Most of them were sweet messages like taking good care of his health, sweet lyrics from songs, encouraging words and random heart doodles. But there were days when they all had the same thing written on them and it was “Coffee, tea or Sanie”. Seonghwa’s been shrugging it off ever since he’s received the first one because he thinks of it as a joke.

San stands up and goes around to Seonghwa’s side and takes his arm. He pulled the older off his seat and walks straight to the hallway going to the rooms. Seonghwa’s hands were trembling as he felt San’s soft skin. His breath has gotten heavier and he had a fuzzy feeling in his head. He’s probably so fucking red right now and he could already sense the devil inside of him overwhelming his rationality. San stops right in front of Seonghwa’s bedroom door without letting go of the older’s arm.

“So..” San faces Seonghwa and makes the sexiest smirk he has ever displayed in front of anyone. “How hard do you want to do it?”


End file.
